Decisions in Marriage

I have noticed that in my family contrary to what history says about the man being the head and making most of the decisions my mother makes most of the big decisions in the family. My dad is rather passive and usually always tells us to go to her for answers. But lately since their marriage issues have started catching up with them my father is taking a more dominant role which has lead to a lot of arguments. It seems like they are fighting for control of the family. I also think that it might include race. My mom is black and my dad is white but my father is very interested in other cultures and I think finds himself more acculmated to them than to his own culture. My mother is very firm in her culture and from this strong sense of self-identity she has grown a very dominant and strong personality that leads her to want to be in charge.