my thoughts on Single life

The class of the single life is very interesting. Sometimes I want to be single, sometimes I do not want. Even though I never date with anyone before, I saw many friends around me date or married. Some of them are enjoy of dating and marriage. One of my friends who is still celibated. She is 27 years old now and she holds this opinion for more than 15 years. She said her parents had divorced because of that her father fell for another woman. She does not believe true love since that time. Maybe this is the main reason that she is celibated and she wants it that way. At the very beginning, I always tell her that do not be a permanent single. I thought that to be a permanent single one would feel very lonely about their life. Though this class I realised that there are many advantages of the being single, such as, personal development; diverse personal experiences; control over ones life and career opportunities. Now I am 20 years old. No matter I will be a single one or not, I hope I have a happy life.

Roomates

My roomate has stopped going to class. It seems she sleeps more than she is awake. I have tried to hint to her that she needs to change her habits but it's as if she doesn't care. If she doesn't get her grades up this semester she may not be attending school here in the fall. It makes me very sad to see something like this happening because she is one of my best friends and I don't know what I would do if she wasn't around. It's weird because she always goes to work and pays her bills on time and runs weekly errands but for some reason she's not focused on her schoolwork. I have tried to make her realize that to suceed to life these days you almost always have to have a higher education. But she doesn't seem to mind. Maybe it's because her parents are still helping her out alot. I guess since I started paying for everything on my own at 15 I became very independent and I learned to appreciate things a lot more. I also know how hard it is to survive in this economy without a high paying job. I guess I really hope she gets ahead of the game soon cause I want her to be in my life forever, not just until the end of the semester.

Single Life

I also found Tuesday’s class very interesting. The more I look around and think about the people in my life, I realize that I have a lot more single friends than I thought. Though the typical course of action is to grow up, get married, and have kids, I have seen many people in my life that have stayed single, and they are fine with that. Maybe they don’t stay single forever, but it really does seem like people are getting married later in life and just really focusing on themselves, which I don’t think is a bad thing.

Single

In class we had some interesting discussions. Dr. Hollist facilitated the conversation but the class really did maintain much of what was said. Being single and being with someone is a concern of everyone. It all comes down to love or falling in love with is probably one of the greatest and worst feelings in the world. It's great when you fall in but the hard part is when you fall out or are forced to fall out. I have been in love once and it was enough to make me want to stay single for 3 years. I am now in a relationship again but it is very scary. I keep thinking back to last time and wondering if I can even allow myself to fall in love again. That is one of the good things about being single that we didnt discuss in class, it's safe. People don't think about it that way because they are hung up on the bad emotions that are associated with being single like the loneliness and depression but those feelings are probably better than what you will feel if you get involved with someone and how much it will hurt. When your single there is not really anyone hurting you, no one has your heart and it's easier to stay detached.

Single to Dating!

I am 22 years old and had been single my whole life up until 8 months ago. I wasn't looking for anyone and I was enjoying my life as a care free, fun loving, outgoing, energetic person. Last summer I started a job at a local grocery store with just one think in mind, making money for the school year. I really didnt want to make friends or have anything to do with the people I worked with, I was there to do a job and to do it well. About 3 weeks into the summer, I was over at my aunt and uncles house for dinner. My aunt, who has always been hounding me to find a boyfriend or just go out with guys, started giving me advice for making boys like me. During college, this aunt was a boy crazy sorority girl. Me on the other hand, I have dreams and goals and not drinking too much mentality. It was hard for me to here her advice when I liked the life I had and enjoyed being single. 3/4 of the way through the summer, I started hanging out with this guy from work. We really enjoyed being around each other and things started to take off. Now 8 months later, I see a hole new life. Im more open to things and ready to take on new experiences. It amazed me how much different my life is now. I know I would be able to go back to being single if I needed to. I liked the single life and sometimes I miss is, but life changes and I have enjoyed the new challenges I have faced over the last 8 months. I wouldnt change anything if I had a second chance.

Single Life

I really liked the discussion we had on Tuesday about single life. I have been single my whole life, and for the most part it is a choice. I don't go out looking for guys because I believe that when I'm ready and the time is right, the perfect guy for me will come into my life. Until that time, I LOVE to just be able to hang out with my friends and I like being single. I can't imagine being like others where they have to have someone in their life to satisfy them. I think there is nothing wrong with being single. At some point, yes, I do want to get married and definately have kids, but I'm not rushing into it.

In the discussion, I liked how we talked about reasons people are single. Someone brought up the point that it could be because their parents are divorced and they don't want that to happen to them. When my parents were first talking about divorce last year, that's exactly how I felt. I was like "well, if it can happen to them after 18 years, then who is to say it won't happen to me?" Even though I am going through my parents divorce at the moment, I have to say that those feelings of being scared to get married and have my husband do to me what my dad did to my mom, are completely gone. I know that to make a marriage succeed, you have to work at it and not give up and you have to want to be in that marriage. For my parents, that's not what my dad wanted, and I think it's best that he is not in my life. I want better for my kids than I had and have it.

I am enjoying this class so far, and I think everything we talk about is relevant to my life in some way, and will be at some point.

Sophia Grace

Sophia Grace is my niece. She's is absolutely beautiful. I love her so much and she's only been in my life for such a short time. I went to see her tonight and its just amazing to watch her grow and develop. I don't know what causes this, but every time she laughs or smiles, I can't help laughing or smiling back. She's got me wrapped around her finger that's for sure. The only thing is... I don't like holding her. I don't like holding my own niece. I'm just afraid I'm going to drop her or that I'm going to make her cry. I'm scared of her I guess. I wish I could learn to get over my fear so that I could hold my precious niece.

single life and the test

Well, I think I did well on the test. It was not as hard as I thought it was going to be.
Our lecture on tuesday was interesting, I have been single for a while, and in some ways its choice and in others opportunity. Most of the guys I know are not very good influences on me. I don't want to date someone who would pressure me to do stupid things, or disrespect my beliefs. I think being single right now is in some ways a wise choice because, I am young, I don't want to be tied down. Also I have no idea what I want in my life, I want to focus on myself right now. We talked about knowing ourselves before getting involved with others, which is common sense, but it's so true. Although there are many pros to being single, sometimes it sucks. A lot of my good friends have boyfriends, and it would be nice to go out on double dates, or be able to relate to what they are saying. It would be nice to have someone there who I can love and trust.

Ok so I also liked today's discussion. It actually made things a little clearer in my eyes. I have lots of friends who have either gone from relationship to relationship or have just came out of a long term relationship and don't quite know what to do with their new single life. For that matter I have friends who have always been single. Being their friend they look to me to talk about things and I feel with today's discussion I know what to say to them all now. I mean my friends that go from relationship to relationship I see how they are those people that love having someone their for them and don't like being single, they just have that feeling of needing that relationship. Like one of the girls in class today talked about the cup story her mom tells her, that is exactly what I see in some of them. My friends that have been in long term relationships I see a different yet similar situation. They feel like they won't find anything like that again and they won't be married until their thirty and worry about their future. They are those people that want to start their lives right now and don't know how to deal with their new single life. I feel like I have the right words to say to both of them now. Our discussion today made perfect sense they need to find who they really are before they place themselves into any relationship. I mean they need to find what they really want out of their lives and not what others think. They also need to make sure that they are healthy and what is best for them. I see that they are all the type that have that fear of being permanently single for the rest of their lives. It's not that they aren't ever going to find anyone they just haven't found them yet and while they have their chance to be single they should use it to their advantage. I myself am single and I can totally apply everything we learned to myself.

I enjoyed our discussion today in class about single life. It was really interesting to hear all of the technical language about how it feels to be single. I think its really stereotypical how basically everyone thinks that you need to grow up, get married and have kids. Some people don't want that lifestyle at all and they shouldn't be looked down on because they are different. It is becoming so much more common to live a single life than waht is used to be. I think its really cool that people do what they want, they don't listen to the "social cues" of what society says they should or shouldn't do. I liked the part about finding your true self and really knowing who you are before you enter a relationship. That really made me think cause that can be a hard thing to do and I know I struggle with knowing my true self at times. It's so tricky cause life is so random and you never know what could happen. But I thought it was cool how we talked about that quite a bit today.

Genogram

I personally did not enjoy doing the genogram project. I think it would have been interesting if it was just for my viewing or for my family but some of the information that was required to be put on the project I don't think was appropriate. Sharing personal information like that shouldn't really be considered an assignment. I completed the project but I did not put names on mine because once again I thought it was revealing too much information. When I needed to get some additional information on my family from my dad I described the assignment and he to was uncomfortable with it. There isn't anything wrong with my family and most of us are pretty close but by nature we are just private people so sharing with others items of your life that they don't need to know is difficult enough but you do it because you want to. Making it an assignment and taking it for a grade feels like I'm being forced to open up and I just don't think it was right. If we did the genogram like a family tree that would be more acceptable but to have to put if someone was "sexually abused" or if someone has a mental problem along with their names that is honestly just doing to much. I do enjoy the class though and think that the other assignments will be better. Although for the test I wish we had a study guide for the non-essay part, it would help because no one knows what to expect.

Preschoolers

This morning I volunteered for an organization called MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). I had such a blast taking care of those children! I was in the room taking care of the 3-year-olds. But we had a 2-year-old in the room too because he didn't want to be away from his older brother. It was so cool to watch how the older brother took care of his little brother. At snack-time he didn't want to eat until he saw that his baby brother got food too. He kept smiling and encouraging him to interact with the other children. The 2-year-old has a secure attachment with his mother. When his mother was in the room he was happy to walk around and play with all the toys, but when she left he would run to the door and cry. I showed him a toy car and got him to start playing. He evntually turned back into a happy little boy. As soon as his mother came back he ran to her. Its really amazing to see the theories we learn about in class come to life.

Testing time

family science is a great class, it has a much of depth to study; which I will be doing all my life, this is part of my first love. I hope we all do very good on the test, good luck every body. my hardest part of the test maybe will be the essay questions.

I'm a Little Scared

I'm a little scared about the test today but I am going to work hard to try to do my best. I am just confused about a lot of things in the class. I'm very unsure of what is going to be on the test. If anyone has some pointers about the test to help me please feel free to leave a post to this. I just want to do better in this class and after this test I will try my hardest but thats all my thoughts about the class as of right now.

test

In the beginning I thought that this test would be pretty easy if you just come to class all the time and take notes but now I think I was wrong. I think this test is going to be harder than I expected. The essay questions were super hard to answer and once I started studying I noticed that I don’t have as many notes as I thought I did. I only missed one day but I feel like that put me way behind I don’t know.
One thing that always helps me during test, even if it just helps a little is not letting myself get too nervous. I am going to study some more and just tell myself that I did all I could and that there is nothing more I could do right now and that everything should go ok. Then when I take it I answer the questions I for sure know and skip the ones I’m not sure about. I seem to do a lot better than when I’m nervous. When I’m nervous I seem to forget EVERYTHING I studied.
So anyway, good luck to everyone on the test today!

Geneology

I really enjoyed the geneology assisignment like everyone else has talked about. Although I had a hard time fitting my whole family 3 generations back family and failed. I know I have a large family, but I didnt realize just how big it is till you see it on paper. It was fun to see how long people had been married and how close I was to cousins I dont think about very often. It was very interesting to see how often I do see some of my cousins who live far away compared to the cousins who live in the same town. In a large family, you dont realize how much you do know about everyone and how fast gossip runs through so everyone knows about it. Over Christmas, one of my cousins started a rumor and wanted to see how long it would take to get back to her. This was right after we had lunch and sure enough, by the time we opened presents she had heard the rumor again. It had only been about 2 hours and run through all 85 of us in the family. Ofcourse we had even more fun letting everyone know we made up the rumor to stop it. I love my family and Im glad I got the opportunity to get a little more insight into how everyone works!

Genogram and Test

So, when I first heard about the genogram project I was a little nervous because it sounded like a lot of work that I wouldn't have time to do, but it wasn't hard at all. I knew most of the information, but I think I found out a lot of information too. Doing this project, it made me realize how much divorce we actually have in our family. My grandparents on my dad's side were divorced and then both got remarried, but my grandparents on my mom's side have been married and never divorced. My uncle (on my mom's side) and his wife were both married to other people and divorced them and now they are married to each other. A few of my aunts/unlces on my dad's side have gotten divorced/remarried also. Also, my mom and dad are now going through a divorce. My dad's side of the family is so confusing, and I didn't even try to put it down on the genogram. I don't have contact with my dad or his family, so I just put his siblings, and not their husbands/wives because for me, they are not an important part of my life anymore. I thought this project overall was a great way to get us involved in our families, and I'm glad it was assigned.

As far as this test goes, I am a little nervous. I have been to every class, and take notes on everything, but I still feel like I don't know what to study/what to expect on the test. I never do that great on tests anyways, so for me, tests are a stressful thing. I just hope that if I don't do that great on it that I will have a chance to make up for it later on during the semester.

Genogram

When we were first talking about the genogram project, I was doubtful. It just sounded like a lot of work. I finally started working on it and was drawn in. I called my dad and drilled him for dates (he has a mind for dates), when I told him the project I was doing, he also got really excited. He begin for share family stories, both good and bad. My dad loves to share family stories, so I had heard almost all of them before. Usually I get angry but I just have to remind myself that someday I will want to remember these stories and being repetative is the best way to remember them. Drawing out my family genogram was the most interesting part. When you see you family on paper it is a lot different than when you think about them. We have had a lot of death in our family. I just thought I was paranoid, but drawing it out made me realize, it was very true. The most interesting part was the relationship between everyone. One of my uncles is not very well liked this became more aparent after I heard stories and was drawing out the relationship lines. I really liked this project and I feel I know my family on a whole different level that I would have never known about before, if I never would have had to draw a genogram.

Genogram Project

The genogram project was actually really fun. I talked to some relatives that I hadn't in awhile to get some information about my large family. I learned a lot of about different family members, and it brought back a lot of memories from my childhood and us all being together. This project also made me think about how short our lives can be and how quickly time flies by. Realizing how long it has been since some of my family members have died really makes you appreciate life a little more. It also makes me thankful to have such a large and diverse family because when we do get together, thought it isn't often, we always have a good time and wish that we would get together more often. Most of my relatives live in Colorado, so doing this project and thinking about my relatives has really made me miss them. I really wish that we could spend more time together and we were all close like we were when I was little. There are a lot of my family members that I don't talk to very often because of how far away we are. The last time we all really got together was in Decemeber because of a funeral. Although this was a sad time for my family, it was nice that we all got to be together again. It has been years since we have all been together, and it was so good to see everyone again, even though it was because of a funeral. I'm really glad that this genogram project was assigned because it really made me think about my family and appreciate each person a little more.

My genogram..

So I loved doing the genogram. Certain older members of my family have recently been trying to update our family tree so it was easy to just call my mom and ask for the information. She emailed all the information to me and I was able to make my genogram without to many headaches. I was hoping for a piece of information about my family I didn't know because my family isn't too complicated and I thought I knew about almost everything. I did end up finding something that was interesting to me. See my dad was married before he married my mom. I always knew about it and I knew I had two half sisters and for the most part I thought I knew everything there was to know about it. When we lived close to my half sisters when i was very little we stayed in touch with them but when i was about 4 and we moved we kind of lost touch. I always wondered all about my dad's past but it was something that was very touchy to him and i never wanted to bring up bad memories or say the wrong thing. When I asked my mom about all my families history though she told me the dates to my dad's marriage and I was a little surprised. I realized my dad had never told me how long he was married to his ex wife and it just surprised me a little bit that they were almost married for ten years. I guess it shocked me because he never went into so much detail about things so the way he talked about it made me think they were only married a short time and had two kids the end type of a thing. I know I didn't find anything too great but doing the project did make things clear to me. I was able to see how old my grandparents really were and I looked at how old they were when they had their first child and that kind of stuff. Like I said I loved it and I really got to know more about my extended family just by doing something so simple.

This Weeks Test

I'm very nervous about the upcoming exam. I have attended every class but I feel like I don't know what to study. I've begun to read all assigned chapters and making notecards but the idea of only having 30 questions on the entire exam makes me extremely nervous. There aren't a lot of points offered throughout the semester so I feel like if I mess up on one test then my grade already goes down the drain. Tests are so stressful. I hate it when you go to every single class, take amazing notes, read chapters, make numerous notecards and then you STILL do bad. I just have to do well in this class and the pressure is building up. If I do well on the first exam then I will do well the entire semester because my outlook on the class will be positive. I'm going to try and be optimistic about this exam and just hope for the best!

So this genogram thing was pretty fun. I have a pretty boring family so I really had to try and come up with some good stuff to make us look more interesting. I think this project is really a great way to find out some things about your family that you maybe never would have found out before if you didnt just ask. I liked the different symbols that represented certain things, then you didnt have to write it all in.

I thought it was pretty cool that our professor showed us the little rock nine video. I had known a little bit about that but not near as much as I learned in class that day. It was really neat to see what really happened and how they were treated and how they never gave up. I think its so awesome to know that because of those brave students our schools are now the way they are. Its just a crazy concept that is kind of hard to get ahold of sometimes but I'm really glad he showed us that video. It really had an impact on me.

opression of women

oppression of women by men; yeah , because the tradition of the woman in the family in the past has been mom at home while dad goes to work to make a living. this will be a focus for me as a professional. we as professionals think of the stay at home mom as the model family; early in the 40-70s the Ozzie and Harriot and Leave it to Beaver was the model, things have changed and we must be more aware and educated to deal with the oppressed woman. women are not sex objects to be admired by the construction worker and picture pasted to a cover in some magazine, they are God's creation.

family authority

patterns of family authority...I have learned something that is uncommon to the family dynamics and it's function.

Matriarchy - female authority
Patriarchy- male authority
Equalitarian - shared authority

For the most part, my wife and I have established our home as Equalitarian. But there are some situations where the final call is all on me shifting the authority to Patriarchy. In the circle of our friends, I would say that most of them are and have historically been patriarical.

I recently read in an article that children in military homes are more prone to depression and other mental disorders. I was a little surprised to read that because I come from a military home and my brother and I never had an problems. I loved being able to travel all over the world. And while my dad had to go away a lot, when he was home we appreciated him all the more.
I'm engaged and my fiance is joining the Air Force this summer. I'm not worried about those statistics at all because I have no doubt that I can raise a happy military family.

A video which touched my heart

From the last class, we all have watched a video named Little Rock Nine. This is my first time understand such issue which really gave me a deep impression. From these, it lets me think of my situation. Yellow skinned, black hair, an asian look in a totally different cultures country. I have never met any bad things yet like in the video, those blacks were isolated by the white one. Discrimination still occurs in the world. Family is the basic fundamental of society. A society is made of a lot of families, any skin colors are involved. It is like sometimes there would be some argument over something between family members. So, different races or cultures would have argument as well. Strong family should have certain solutions to solve the problems. So in such a civilization society should have to settle the races and cultures problem. Overall, I think that we are living in a world, where we sharing the oxygen and everything. We shall tolerate, respect each others’ culture and others, get along well.

Little Rock Nine

I have heard this story time and time ago especially during Black History Month but still every time I watch that video it breaks my heart. Watching those people just be abused and such violence and hatred never ceases to amaze me. Being that I am a minority I can understand what these people had to go to. But I have never been placed in such an extreme situation like this. My natural reaction would be to defend myself but the minorities during that time couldn't even lift a finger against their attackers. It is human nature to defend ones self and these people weren't even given that right. The Little Rock Nine had such courage and I give them the utmost respect. It also makes me wonder for the white people that were so against blacks what kind of teaching did they receive from their parents and society to make them think they were better than someone. It's one of the functions of a parent to train up their children and teach them the ways of the world and how did treating someone with such violence and disrespect become something that was taught?

Genogram

I started the genogram the other day and I thought at first that this project was going to be boring and a lot of work. I began to realize that it is actually a lot of fun. It does take a lot of work but I think it is neat to look at my family on paper. I’ve never done that before. When I was getting ready to start this I was thinking that my family is going to be pretty boring but once I get going on it I notice that my family is more interesting than I thought! Even if your family is kind of boring you can add more functions to show how they get alone and make yours more in-depth. It takes time you have to sit down and really think of each member of your family separate and how close you are with them and everything. The hardest part for me is probably getting everyone’s birthdates. Also what’s neat about this project I have told a few family members about it and they are excited to see it when I’m done and I think that I will end up keeping this project for awhile. It would be fun to store it away and see if any of things on there had really changed. I would think that 10 years from now my families genogram would look different for sure. I think that would be fun to look at it in ten years with my family and talk about everything all the differences!

Family Genogram

I have been working on my family genogram lately and it has made me really think about my family. It has been interesting looking at some of the dates that my family members were born/married/died. My parents are part of very large families, so I have had to gather a lot of information to get dates and relationship information. This has been really interesting for me and I really like learning more about all of my family members. I'm glad that we have this assignment because it has made me really think about my family and it helps me understand why they are the way the are. Learning a little more about how my family members grew up and the relationships that they had with each other has made me understand more about who they are today.

Little Rock Nine

I really enjoyed the youtube video we watched in class about the Little Rock Nine. I had never heard anything about it before and that video sparked lots of interest in the situation. After class I found lots more of information about it. That would be so hard to go through and to be a parent of one of those children and know what you are letting them go through. They made a huge impact in history, and will forever be remembered for how brave they were. It really made me think about how large of impact that would make on your life. That is not an issue most people have to deal with on an everyday basis. Even though that was a long time ago, it got me thinking how we still have a lot of discrimination in the world, sometimes not to that extreme, but there is still a lot. I really liked how I believe it was Brazil, just went by the color of your skin for demographics. Everyone just gets to choose their own skin color and it doesn't matter what your family or anyone else says. It really shows how individuals can make up a family. Several people in my family are adopted, and I hope they never ever feel like outsiders because their color of skin is not the same as everyone elses in the family. It really shows that a family is just all about love.

I have heard a lot about Nadya, the woman who just had octuplets, and now has 14 kids alltogether. She is not married, but is trying to raise these kids by herself, with the help of her family. But, now, with her recent additions, it looks like her mom is turning her back on her.

I was watching an interview with Nadya's mom the other day, and the things she was saying were very hurtful. I understand that Nadya's idea is pretty crazy, especially being single, not having enough money to raise these kids, and not having the best house to raise these kids in, but to say those things publicly about your own child, I think is wrong. If she didn't believe in her daughter, she shouldn't say those things to the media. I think her opinions should be kept to herself, and she should try to resolve the conflict she has with her daughter privately.

I was talking to my mom about Nadya's situation and she said, ..."the doctor should have to pay for the bill..." talking about the bill from the In Vitro. In other words, my mom didn't think that they doctor should have done the procedure on Nadya being that she was not married and already had 6 kids. I understand someone wanting to have kids, because I do when the time is right, but to have so many when you aren't married, and don't have the right tools so to speak. I think it's hard enough to have a single parent as a mom like I do at the moment and she's trying to take care of my brother and myself and it's completely ridiculous how hard it is.

Nadya Suleman and the Octuplets

Last night I was watching the interview with Nadya Suleman and her reasoning of having 14 children. I have always wanted a lot of kids, but I know its not going to happen and I'm not going to risk everything. I was thinking about the attachment theory during Nadya's interview. While she was growing up, she was not close to either her mother or her father. She got married and later decided she didn't want to be married, she just wanted kids. Under the attachment theory, I think she is having kids to make up for the lost or lack of relationship with her parents. Nadya Suleman surprised me with the way she went about fulfilling her need for someone to need her. I wander what kind of relationship those 14 kids are going to have with her and with there siblings as they grow up.

Today when we talked about our heritage and which of our parents is more dominate in our families I wondered why my family was always more into my dads. I called my dad and I talked to him about all we learned in class and how interesting it was to me. See my dad is Czechoslovacian and my mom is German. Every year since I can remember my parents have taken my family to Czech days, which is a festival in Clarkson, which is also where my dad was raised and lots of my family live. When it comes to mom's German heritage we never have done anything really. When I asked my dad the question of why, he said that when my parents got married my mom started to get really interested in my dad's heritage. He never forced my mom to go to the festival or anything like that she just showed an interest and always loved going. I know that while my dad was growing up his parents made it know to him his heritage. Now my family enjoys eating sauerkraut and dumplings, kolochies, and strudels during holiday dinners. My mom even makes the dishes herself. I wondered if the reason of my mom showing so much interest in my dad's heritage would be because her parents never made that big of a deal about their heritage like my dad's did so when my dad showed such strong interest in his she felt the curiosity to know more to make up what she lacked with hers. I love how this class makes me think about my family and how I apply everything we learn to my family. I've learned a lot about my family so far and I can't wait to keep learning more.

Healthy Attachment Behavior

One of the discussions that was held in class was about healthy attachment behavior. We watched a clip from the movie Air Force One about how the daughter of Harrison Ford showed acceptable affection towards her character. We also talked about how Harrison Ford showed his affection towards his daughter. I'm a huge Sex and the City fan and I have just recently started watching every season. I noticed in season 4 episode 9 Charlotte is desperately trying to conceive a baby with her husband, Trey, who is 40 years old. Trey has a very unusual relationship with his mother for his age.

*Charlotte begins ovulating and walks into the bathroom to snatch her husband and walks in on Trey taking a bath while his mother is sitting on the side of the tub talking to him. Charlotte freaks out and Trey things nothing of it.


Charlotte: "What were you doing up there?"
Trey: "Up where? What do you mean?"
Charlotte: "What do you mean, what do I mean? You're mother was watching you bathe"
Trey: "She was not watching me bathe we were having a conversation while I was in the bath"
Charlotte: "Well I don 't know how you were brought up but that is not acceptable parent-child bath time behavior pass the age of 5, even 4 in some cases. And if you think that I'm bringing a child into that, that I will be that kind of mother then you better think again, she may have raised you like that but I am not your mother."

If it wasn't for that discussion that was held in class that day I would have just watched the episode and let the scene fly by. But the scene triggered a lightbulb and I was able to relate it to a situation outside of the classroom.

So my grandparents came to visit this weekend and we got to talking a lot about family stuff. Some old issues from the past were brought up and it got a little emotional. I starting telling my family about how much I'm learning in this class about family structure and function. They thought it was so interesting how families shape into the way they are because of how certain people in the family influence it. It was really interesting to hear all about the problems our family had in the past. I was trying to figure out what went wrong and how these things ended up happening as a result to certain things. I love this class because it makes me feel so much more educated on my family and why we do the things we do. I like sharing the information I learn in class with people because almost everyone can relate to it or knows what I'm talking about.

Family Strengths Inventory

When we took the American Family Strengths Inventory in class the other day, I found it very interesting to see what my family's strengths and weaknesses are, and areas that we need to improve on. I also found what areas aren't really important to my family. What I noticed the most from that inventory is that we communicate very well and value each other and demonstrate commitment. Although there are obviously many ways that our family can improve to be stronger, as many other families can as well, I believe that my family is strong and we work through any problems that arise in a healthy way, by talking them out and providing each other with support. This family strengths inventory really made me appreciate my family more and made me see how strong and close my family really is.

Incledible Genogram

To complete the homework, Genogram, I have spent a lot of time online chatting with my parents, to get as much information as I can. From these, I have understood our family structures, functions and found out that the structures are kind of simple. No divorce involved yet, no premarital sex. Their emotional relationship not really closed though it is supposed to be. At my generation, my family members usually have only one kid. Through the genogram, I learnt more about all the family members. What had happened to them, when were their marriages. Overall, I think that this class is really awesome.

Confused

I apparently missed the blog that was due last week so this is my first one and I am not sure at all what were are supposed to blog about. But just looking back on the class I am really enjoying it. Our professor does a great job of setting a comfortable teaching atmosphere and I don't think I've ever felt this comfortable to speak out in this large of class. I can easily understand the concepts and his examples of things like letting us watch that part of My Big Fat Greek Wedding in efforts to help us understand family processes. I do feel like I'm learning a lot and I actually enjoy coming to class!

Class Review

I have previously taken this coarse before and the reason I didn't do the best in the class was because of the teacher. I just wanted to say how PLEASED I am with the teaching system that is presented in the classroom. I appreciate the class involvement and a teacher that doesn't show/reflect a certain point of view. I understand that through college there are going to be some teachers that don't meet my specific criteria but there is absolutely no need for personal comments to be made about the way I was raised. I hated going to her lecture classes because I felt like I was constantly disagreeing with her and was so agitated that I eventually quit going. I actually look forward to class this semester because the criteria discussed is mutal and the feedback from classmates is informative. The grade that I will reflect at the end of this semester will be dramatically increased because of the ever desired teaching style that is expressed in this coarse.

Family

I have never really been close to one of my 19 year old brother. Although I have never remembered a time with out him always around. Lately it has hit me what an important relationship we have together. When we were younger, our parents were NOT the best at keeping us from fighting and we had favoritism from our parents. When I was 11 and he 8 our parents had a baby. Which made my now 19 year old brother no longer the baby. Our worlds changed completely as you can imagine. The older two, as we are commonly referred too, got worse in our fighting. I got along much better with baby brother when he was old enough to understand what was going on in the world. I then went away to college and started to get along better with the 19 year old, but worse with the baby. Today I got a phone call from my 19 year old brother and didn't realize how close we have become over the last 4 years. I really do think not living in the same domain has helped our relationship. It surprises me it took 22 years to understand the importance of the relationships around me. I probably owe this class and the family strength exercise to thank for me finally realizing what strong family relationships mean. I didn't realize how supportive my family was until we did that exercise. It has opened my eyes to no long judge my family and compare us to others around. I love my family and now appreciate them more than ever!

Support System

Last night I was sitting in a church service next to one of my friends. My youth pastors and their kids, who are my friends, were standing up front talking to the guest speaker, and I couldn't help but feel a little jealous. Not jealous in bad way, but jealous wishing that I had what they had sometimes. Don't get me wrong, my family is great, and they are my biggest supporters, but my youth pastors have THE best relationship as a family that I have ever seen, and sometimes I wish I had that. My friend and her brother are really close and it's wierd because I would never think of hanging out with my brother like they do all the time. My youth pastors are like my second set of parents. They are two of the most amazing people I have ever met in my life, and I feel lucky to have them in my life. We all call them "mom" and "dad" even though we all have our own parents. They are just like another set of parents though. They keep us all accountable and love us like we were all their own kids. I would never give up the life I have right now, but sometimes I wish that I had a family like theirs for just one day to see what it's like.

I feel like even though they aren't a part of my family, they are still my support system. They build me up and make me feel good, just like my actual family.

So some of my close friends are dating and I had never really understood some of the things that went on in their relationship when they would come to me. I was sitting in class the other day and it just hit me, it's because of their families. I didn't realize that the way you were treated within the first 2 years of your life basically helps to shape the person you are today. I hadn't really thought about the amount of love and affection in a family could really affect an individual later on in life. Some of the issues in their relationship deal with the amount of love and affection that is expressed in one family and really not there at all in the other family. One of them wonders why the other doesn't express their feelings towards the other as easy as they do, but in reality it is because their family never showed them how to while growing up. One of them seems to have no idea what they are doing sometimes and almost seem socially/relationship awkward but their parents never really expressed a healthy relationship in front of their kids so the kids aren't really sure of what a good relationship looks like. I think this class is so interesting because I feel like all of those questions I have wondered all my life about why this person does this or why don't they do that...it really is because of a heavy impact of their family. I love learning all of these new things.

Hello. So I love this class and how much it helps me to understand my family. When we talked about how families deal with a crisis I thought of the most recent one my family has gone through. My family is made up of my dad and mom, my older sister, me and my younger brother. My family and I have always been really close so a couple of years ago when my sister got married and never told any of us it was very difficult to deal with. At first my parents question what they did wrong but I was able to see it bring our family closer together in the end. I saw me and my brother comfort and support our parents. Also my parents supported my sisters decision after they got over the shock. It really showed how close my family really is when my sister disappointed all of us but we were able to forgive and support her decision. It was just hard because we never saw it coming. My sister was never the type to do something like this, she always had things planned and for the most part she was very open to all of us. Our family has always been very close though and that was what helped us all get through it. Through reading our book it talks about the different stages when dealing with a crisis: Stage 1 Onset, Stage 2 Disorganization, and Stage 3 Reorganization. Reading this helped me to understand the process my family went through during our crisis. I've realized that my family is definitely close enough to handle any crisis that might come our way and it's very comforting to know this.